What do you do when you want to make changes but you don’t know the right path? What’s better: action or stillness?
So, things are moving along, at a wonderfully rapid pace for me right now. I’m seeing all kinds of opportunities coming my way.
First, I send out a notice to my spiritual/metaphysical/meditation group of several hundred people and tell them I’m going to start a group coaching soon, asking who is interested. And within a minute, I kid you not, I get a reply saying, “I’m interested.” Wow, that was fast. And a few others followed. A great affirmation that people want this and want it from me. Cool. (My psychic ESPN is my secret weapon in my coaching).
Then, a friend, Bumper Moyer, calls for some advice on publicity promotion for a friend he has coming into Annapolis in October. Turns out this friend, Rodney Barnes is from our town of Annapolis and has made it big in Hollywood as a writer/producer (for Chris Rock among others) Now he’s writing and creating comics and is doing some public events in Maryland to launch his new comic book So, I give Bumper the PR 101 (something I really need to teach online because I know my shit on this!) This is pretty exciting to me because I love hanging out with funny people, writers and creative types. And I have this secret wish to be up close and personal on a sit com some day … hanging with the writers (and writing?), sitting at a table read (or being a character reading at the table read!), or being one of the favorite funny characters on a hilarious sit com (the BIG dream.) Or maybe just watching sit-coms on TV, which I also love!
Then, a friend calls who is wanted to get rid of some furniture and wants to know if I know someone in the community I recently helped. Background, I had recently responded to a neighborhood Facebook post on the need for air conditioning units in public housing where low-income residents live, the disabled, working poor, single moms, vets, etc. Long story short, I went to DaJuan Gay’s home (the amazing young person who posted on our FB page to call this abomination to our attention), we made up a video, and launched a crowd raising effort. In one day we raised $4,000, in three raised $12,000 and delivered 80 air conditioning units to families in need, during this 100 degree heat wave. This blew my mind, after 30 years without AC in many of these homes. It amazes me what can be done when the right people come together with purpose, passion and experience.
This effort introduced me to some of the best people in my community, the generous humanitarians and the hard-working lower-income folks who deserve to live in a livable home. Wonderful collaboration! So, because of this, I knew just the family who needed living room furniture — a single mom of 5 kids who was moving into a home that day. So, she got a living room set, with a pull out bed so she would actually have a bed on which to sleep. (Like a good mom, had beds for all her kids, first, but not for her yet.)
Also, I went to a primary election night party in Annapolis at Metropolitan Kitchen (delish!) At the end of the night, I had a chance to talk to Gavin Buckley, who I think will be our next mayor, and told him how excited I was about his dedication to youth in our community. I told him I was going to an event called “Challenge Day” that is an anti-bullying, self-esteem building program. I asked if he had someone on his team that might like to go. He said, “I would!” He’s a hands-on kinda guy! I know if the right people participate (remember, purpose, passion and experience) we can bring this program to our community and make a huge difference for our young people.
Backing up just a tad … because I was going to a party I put on my best “have fun and look good doing it” wardrobe. That included a black fringe top, jeans, a funky black and white jacket and black high heels. It was all good until the high heels. What was I thinking? I really don’t wear high heels anymore; I dress like an old lady. Comfort, comfort, comfort.
So, then, in my list of so many things happening I woke up with a huge pain in my lower back. So, I went to my trusted chiropractor and he did his thing, although my muscles were so in spasm and tight, I knew it would take more than one visit to take care of this high heel wearing fool. So I took a hot bath that night and woke up and was SORE. The next day, I couldn’t even get out of bed. I had to call my daughter in the next room to bring me a heating pad. Ridiculous. I sure hope I looked good in my heels because I was paying the price big time!
So all these great opportunities and now I am grounded. Like really. Enough that I am dreading when I have to pee, knowing it will be a painful enterprise. The getting up part, not the peeing part. I did not have that much fun at the party!
I had just bought a “complete meal” home package delivery by Purple Carrot (vegan, my new healthy eating habit, that I didn’t plan and was just happening naturally … thank you GOD! And yummy, it turns out.) So I had three meals waiting to be made. But I can’t get out of bed. I post my dilemma on Facebook, kinda in jest but also praying for a kind soul, and say, who wants to cook today? And one of the amazing community members I recently met actually offers to come over and cook. Wait, what? You mean that still happens. Am I living in Mitford? (I always wanted to, where everyone helps everyone, knows everyone and even the quirky folks are adored and everyone finds their right partner…ah!) Anyhow, that was AMAZING. Yes. And Annapolis turns out to have a little Mitford in its soul. Loving it!
Now you’d have to know me better to know that me even posting that “ask” is a stretch. Asking for help like that on Facebook. So afraid for rejection, ridicule or an ill-intentioned single man asking to help. Of course if he was wicked handsome and funny I might take the offer. Ends up a close friend came over instead and not only did I get a great meal, but wonderful company. And I could actually sit and not move and hurt myself more, which tended to happen … as I bent over to pick up a dog dish (ouch), open a window (eek), sit on the couch or get off the couch (really?), or do anything besides breathing. What a relief to be able to just sit and heal. And don’t you just love good company when you’re hurting (unless you haven’t had a shower and you look scary).
So, this sitting thing was also really good for my mind. Because after a while, when I was alone, my mind was so quiet. I knew I couldn’t do much, so my mind didn’t think of a thousand things “to do”. The quiet body led to a quiet mind. Nice.
And it was clear to me that I didn’t have to figure out which of these great opportunities I most wanted to happen. I wasn’t attached to the outcome. Wait, what? I was aware that I had no idea how it would turn out and I was okay with that. I may or may not coach. I may or may not “play” on a sitcom. I may or may not get more involved with anti-bullying efforts. I may or may not help on the mayor’s race, or offer my PR services to my city or elsewhere. I may or may not pick up my dog’s food bowl. Well, probably that.
So, being waylaid can be great. And having lots of choices can be freeing versus stressful. It’s only stressful when you think you HAVE to DO something about the opportunities, make a decision right NOW, or are afraid you won’t do one of them well. That inner voice chatter that is so quick to judge and criticize is a dream killer. The quiet mind is friendly and comforting. Kind of like the friend who comes over to cook for you, let’s you sit, feeds you and talks about lovely things that you enjoy talking about. For me, on this day, it is spirituality and contribution to the world.
So, all in all a busy, fun, freeing, hurting, amazing, week. How was your week?
Another day closer to Italy!
Feeling blessed, Sentirsi benedetto
Your intentional (heal wearing/back hurting/activist) co-creator
PR expert and author of Feeling Loved, A Ted E. Bear Story